Taken during team dinner cum birthday celebration for Alicia and James Tan YH on 9th March

Taken just before O2. This is OG5. =D

Taken at Kallang KFC. Team Lunch-ing. =)

Taken during Sports Camp held during the March Holidays.

These 2 photos were taken on one of the 8th March when Hillgrove Female Campcraft Team went for their competition. However, the competition was postpone due to the heavy rain.

These were taken when we (Marianne and I) went out for a movie, The Leap Years, at AMK Hub with Zhong Wei.

These photos are taken during one of the last day during the PAE period. It has been quite some time. Looking back at the photos just brings up so much memories. Enjoy.

I am pissed off with my mum. Very. I just hate the way she views me. Hmph!

School wise, so far so good. Work load is starting to increase but I think so far school is still enjoyable. =)

I will be having a tight schedule. =),ya? haha!
Some photos to share.. (taken after winning against teck whye)

I don't want to be a pampered kid. I would rather learn from mistakes than don't try it at all.

I hate to be underestimated by you. You never bother to tell me what's right and wrong. You never bother to trust and give me a chance.

Seriously, why don't you just ask me not to come home. A home without warmth is totally not a home. Sometimes I just feel so unwanted at home. No one bothers to be with me morally.

---------------------------------------------------

No one bothers to believe in me. No one bothers give me a chance. I try to believe in myself. But when almost everyone especially people who are important to me, don't believe in me, I just find it so hard to give myself the confident to believe in myself. Sometimes, I really just want someone important to believe and give me another chance to learn. Yet, no one is doing so. Everyone always says that even if the whole world don't believe in you, as long as you believe in yourself that will be good enough. But I just find it so hard to do so.

Can you just give me that little faith to allow myself to believe in myself? I am going to lose all the confident that I have.

I tried to trust you but you have just disappointed again. Everyone has always told me that it is always me who has yet to observe enough. But, is this always the case? How can I trust you when you never bother to trust me? How can I trust you when always look down at me? How can things work out when you never bother to give me a chance? I have tried to accept certain things but you have always tried to prove to me that I am wrong in accept those things. You never make feel that I am good but instead you always make me feel that I am ousy in all areas. You never bother to support me in what I do. NEVER.

Fine. Since this is exactly what you want then never ever bother to ask me again. NEVER AGAIN!

Once again there are just so many things..


1. How can I push everyone to break their limit? I really want to see us moving to a higher height. It is only 3 months away before our tournaments. We are going to challenge people who have played netball for years and what's more with men. There are so many problems that I need to address. However, no one is understanding the situation.


2. What on earth is happening to NPCC? Attendance dropped termendously. The attitude is not right. Everything is not right. Conflicts are everywhere. *sigh*


3. What's going on with SL? Where have our reputation gone to? What's causing everyone to be so shameful of SL? Where's the pride? Come on!



Everything is going haywire. How can I make things better?

1. School Tie - $7.80
2. Ankle Support - $60.00 X 2
3. Knee Guard - $9.00
4. Toothbrush - $6.50
5. Slingbag - $30.00
6. Shoelaces - $2.00 X 2
7. Jersey - $12.00
8. Netball Workshop - $10.00
9. Highlighter - $2.50
10. Carvanas - $40.00
11. Ankle Weight - $30.00

Total = $271.80

08/03
3 - 5pm: Lesson
5.30pm to night: Outing

09/03
12.30 - 1.30pm: Lesson
3 - 6pm: Netball Training
6pm to night : Outing

10/03 - 12/03
Camp

13/03 - 14/03
Camp

15/03
Homework Day

16/03
12 - 1pm: Lesson
3 - 6pm: Netball Training

1. Chemistry Tutorial
2. Newspaper Reading
3. Biology Tutorial
4. Geography Tutorial
5. Terminals and Airlines
6. Send PAE 08S02 contacts

17/03 - Deadline for Kidznet Workshop
19/03 - Deadline for NYAA
24/03 - Netball Workshop
28/03 - KIdznet Workshop
29/03 - Kidznet Workshop
29/03 - Start of NSL

Full of things!

So many things hitting my mind!

1. I really don't know where is my heart flying to. I am still hanging there or have I moved on? It is just so hard to tell. Here.. there.. *sigh* I don't know..

2. The thought hits me. What I am looking for in life? Who am I comparing with? What do I really want..? Trophys? Myself? or what?..... I don't know..

3. Walls have ears. And I just so hate it when people purposely plant ears at the walls.. Nevermind. It's over.

4.I just realise how much we have grown, how fast time has travelled... I miss the past.. sec sch days, pri sch days. I always feel like those days were just like yesterday but in reality they were just so far ago. It's March already..

5. Everything will be fine!

I am finally back here to blog.

Last Sunday training wasn't a very much pleasant one. Seriously, I only enjoyed the last two games though I needed to work the most. =D Attendance wise, it is all right. However, the attendance is ironic now. *sigh*


Monday morning as I headed to school, my wrist start to feel a pain. It was not very painful but the pain persisted for quite sometime. I thought it was just simply muscleache so I didn't pay much attention to it. When school ended in the afternoon, I head down to PJC to get my transfer done. Afterwhich, I went to buy some stuffs to prepare for the camp (more details in the following paragraphs).

Tuesday, I submitted the forms and eveything. Then Ta Dah! Everything is done. I am finally back home! =P In the afternoon, I realised I actually twisted my wrist on Sunday when I fell. The pain elevated. I couldn't exert forces on to my wrist. Then, I went to tape my wrist. Only then, could I carry out my tasks my efficiently. Then at night, we prepare all that we need to for the next day.


Wednesday!!! It is the start of O2!! *SCREAMS!!* The campers came and settle in the hall in the morning. They had some admin stuffs and ice breakers. Then I left them to prepare for food. For the whole day till night, I was away from my OG to prepare food. It is both fun and sad. It is fun to prepare the food but sad that can't be with the OG. I did the same for Thursday and Friday. But overall, I think I enjoyed myself. =D Through this camp, I re-discovered myself.

Friday, after breaking camp in the afternoon, I went back to Hillgrove to get some adminstrative things done. I happen to meet my NPCC Juniors. I felt quite disappointed. The attendance dropped termendously so did the standard.

Seeing them preparing for the campcraft competition just reminds me so many things. Honestly, I miss those days training for campcraft. I think those are few of the period where I truly enjoyed myself in NPCC.

On Saturday morning, I went with the juniors to HTA for their campcraft competition. However, the rain did not allow them to compete. The competition is postponed. I doubt I will be able to join them. All the best to them!!

Sunday was quite a tough day for me. I wasn't feeling very well. I think I was running a slight fever just before the training. During the training, I didn't perform very well and I wasn't very happy with some people's attitude. But, but, but.. I am glad that the attendance was excellent - full attendance! Let's keep this up, ok? =D

Yesterday was quite a bad day for me. Having lestures in the LT was such a killer for me. I could hardly breathe and my head just feels to heavy. After lesson, I just quickly went home for a go rest and visted the doctor.

Today was a fine day for me. I think everything went well. =D But still, I don't like to stay in air-conditioned areas. =(

All right.. I have more or less sum up my week. Wanted to upload pictures.. but my USB cable isn't helping me.. =(

Today is a pleasant day.

I was in school today to help with the family banner. Actually, I also didn't do much. =/ Family 1, you guys rock. Thank you so much for your understanding and help, especially Judith. I know you have helped me in all ways you can.

I left at around 12.45pm to meet Hui Juan, Syahirah, Atikah, Shi Yun, Isabel and Deborah. It is so nice to meet them again. We had lunch at Lot 1. We had so much to catch up. =D All of us will be going on our separate ways. A few of us are going to JC and the rest are going to polytechnic.

Now thinking back, I miss secondary school life. :S

At around 3pm, home sweet home...

Congratulation Singapore! We will be hosting first Youth Olympic Games in 2010. Go Singapore!
Singapore will be filled with Sports excitement everywhere! First night F1 racing will be held this year September!Asian Youth Games in 2009! Youth Olympic Games in 2010! World Netball championship in 2011! Woohoo!!!! Go Singapore!!!

QUIZES AND MORE QUIZES
1. Does it matter to you if your bf/gfsmoke?
- yes, more than you know.
2. How about drinking?
- just dont get addicted,
3. Do you want someone you cant have?
- No. Whatever that's not mine, will never be mine.
4. If someone liked you right now,would u want them to tell u?
- no.
5. Whats your favorite sport?
- N-E-T-B-A-L-L
6. Its saturday night, you're homealone.. what do you do?
- Call a friend and talk.
8. Can you do the splits?
- Not at the moment
9. Do you like roller coasters?
- Not really. My first experience wasn't good.
10. Whens the perfect time to have aboyfriend/girlfriend?
- when the right one comes.
11. If you could date any celebrity,who would it be?
- no one.
12. Whats your favorite band?
- I like all bands. =)
13. What are you doing this weekend?
- Shopping and Netball!
14. Whats your favorite restaurant?
- idk
15. Do you usually fall for the right or wrong girl/boy?
- not that I know
16. Have you ever hugged someone?
- Ya
17. Ever kissed someone you werent attracted to?
- Not that I can remember. Maybe my parents when I was young.
18. Do you like anyone right now?
- I don't want to know my feelings.
21. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
- his accent.
23. Which do you prefer, beach or the mountains?
- Both. Nature is beautiful!
24. What kind of phone do you have?
- a not very useful phone.
26. Computer or laptop?
- computer
27. What is your favorite store?
- I hardly shop.
28. Jeans or sweats?
- both. Depending on accasion.
29. Which year has been the best so far?
- every year. every year gives me a different experience.
30. How old are you gonna be on your next birthday?
- 17. 3 months plus to go.
31. What should you be doing right now?
- In school.
32. What is your favorite tv show?
- A lot.
33. Color?
- all colours look good and bad depending on the combination.
34. Are you attracted to girls/guys that smoke?
- similar to qn1 leh(i no stm hor). no lah.
35. Would you want a chilled laid back gf/bf or a party animal?
- chilled laid back outside of house,party animal when in my house.
36. Have you ever fallen on your butt in front of a crowd of people?
- not really.
37. Explain your dream car:
- not at the moment
38. What do you do when you're at home?
- relax.
39. Whats your favorite subject?
- Everything except LANGUAGES!
40. Where do you want to go to college?
- ??
41. Do you like to go to concerts?
- no.
42. Favorite type of music?
- idk
43. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
- i am the owner of my bed!
44. Scariest thing you've ever done?
- losing myself
45. Whats the best feature about you would say?
- my eyes
46. What annoys you?
- myself
47. If you had one super power, what would it be?
- teleporting skill
48. Ever gone to saturday school?
- yea.
49. Been kicked out of class?
- no.
50. If you could say anything to anyone?
- *idk*
51. What are some of your favorite quotes?
- no matter what you do, where you do, always enjoy it.
-only one thing matters - attitude.
52. Are you jealous person?
- yea
53. Are you friends with people that you shouldnt be friends with?
- not sure
54. What is your deepest fear ?
- losing myself again.

Things haven't been going well. My silly comments has created a hu-ha. I am really lost now.

I am posted to PJC but I don't know if I want to appeal. Then, I started thinking that maybe I should stop schooling. Life with only studies is so boring. Thinking about it, last year I finished my O, next year will be A already. We are all studying non-stop. Worse still, I am not enjoying learning right now. It is all just a burden. I just feel so heavy.

Previously, I have posted an entry regard why student fail his exams. When I think thoroughly about it, I find it very true. We are using our sleeping hours, our relaxation time to study. Sometimes, I spend as little as 3 hours of sleep per day just to complete my work. Sometimes, I don't even have sufficient time to sms or call my friends to catch up with one another. I have time in my hand but sometimes, I just need to give myself extremely strict discipline. *sigh*

Come to talking about handphone, I realised that handphone is such a wrong electronic device. Hanphone gives me stress. No joke. Having too many sms not read give me stress. Having too many miss call gives me stress too. Having too many people lokinig for me through my handphone will give me the most stress. I hate this feeling. Sometimes, handphone isn't a communication device to me. It is more of a MP3 and Camera to me or a nuisence to me.

*sigh* What to do? Where to go?

Flamingo very nice is it? Very stylo is it? Lift your leg some more la! Even in the center circle, you can't have your leg down for long. Then, your passes go haywire. Come on la! Play netball for so long already, yet your passes are like sec 1. You are such a selfish soul. Everything want to take is it? keep taking la! Please hor, this is a TEAM game. Seriously, if you think netball is just about yourself, then seriously, STOP playing. Go elsewhere that suit you better. Primary school players can shoot better than you! 1 out of ten went in. Hello!!!! You know how hard your defenders work to bring the ball down? Come on la! Please go and brush up your shooting! How long have you been playing Attack? eversince you start playing netball right? then, please do proper runs. You play like you just start to play netball.. time your runs!!! Timings are so off. And move your heavy butt! Come on man.. You think when kenna hamburger still can get the ball easily? seriously 90% you will not get the ball. SO MOVE! can you make sure your teammates are ready before you release the ball? this is a TEAM GAME! Please practice your landing! It's just so wrong. Come on, play let what you should be playing!

I am very pissed with myself. ARGH!

Eventful week!

15th Feb - Camp
16th Feb - Camp
17th Feb - Lesson (11am), Netball(3pm)
18th Feb - Netball (3pm), Lesson (7pm)
19th Feb - Lesson (7pm)
20th Feb - Netball (4pm), Lesson (7pm)
21st Feb - Netball (3.30pm)

This will be my schedule for the next 7 days. School lessons are not shown. Practically everyday, I will only reach home when sky turns dark. Oh well. But it is ok though. =D I love the activities.. =D=D=D=D

Lessons for the past 2 days have been enjoyable but not today. Tues and Wed were excellent but someone spoilt my mood today. Nevermind.

I am tired. Goodnight.

It still hurts, no matter what.

A lesson hit me hard. A year back, someone told me this, " So what if the person is fat and he is happy that he is fat and doesn't want to exercise."

We are following rules that are set by us. Rules are dead but we are flexible. Sometimes, even if we know things are wrong but yet people are happy with what they are doing, should we just let things go the way it has been going or should we stop it?

What matters most in life? Is it going for what is right or is it doing anything as long as you are happy and you don't harm others but you know it is wrong to do so? At the end of the day, seriously, what will matter most? Happiness or doing what's right but you aren't happy with it? But, well it is always best to do something right and be happy at the same time. Then again, this doesn't always happen.

Seriously, if you are forced to choose either one, what will you choose?

You have told me clearly what you are thinking and now I know what I need to go for.

I am not in school today (again).. I fainted at home yesterday. No joke, I am serious here. Yesterday afternoon, after waking up, wash up and I fainted. Luckily, I twisted my ankle. The pain helped me to regain my conscious. But, I was feeling damn weak. I had a rest till evening 6 plus. By then, only did I feel much better. =)

Just now, went to visit doctor. Phew, luckily it isn't a major problem! Thank you so much!!

You are just telling me that you don't care, do you?

Manage to do quite a bit of work yesterday. =)

Yesterday night was out to watch Kung Fu Dunk with Michelle and Shi Jie. Not bad. But, of cos it will be better if it was with you.

Things have repeatly going through my mind. Be it about you, netball, academics, life and etc. For some of them, thinking of them drive me nuts. For some of them, I just can't have the answer out yet. *sigh*

Had a talk with Marianne over the phone yet. We chatted for like 1 and a half hours. We talked about a lot of things, happy matters, sad matters weird matters. A talk with her made me feel much better. Thanks, buddy!

I know I am missing you. I know I want you. But, I don't know what you are thinking.

新年快乐！愿您天天开心，事事顺心！
Happy New Year!

I think the New Year is kind of boring. First thing first, people who I came across, more than half of them, I have no idea who are they. More than 3 quarters of them, I only meet them once a year. Almost everyone, we do not have a common topic. So, practically after saying Happy New Year with a hand shake, we hardly speak a single word to one another. For a few of them, they asked me about my academic matters. And for those who knew about what has been going on these few weeks would know that I am fustrated enough with academics matters. Furthermore, Pig Year didn't look like it was good. Everyone seems to encounter quite a number of problems during the year of Pig. Quite a few discussion among the adults were about some fustrating problems they met last year. Not much of laughters were heard.

Then, my mind was constantly thinking about him. So.. ya..

*sigh*

I am missing you

Another hour to new year(for Chinese). I think it is time to look back and see what have I done for the past whole year.

At the start of Sec 4, little did I expect life to be so busy that I could hardly breath. Looking back at my diary the other day, I realise how much I have grown. Experiences with people have made me look at the world from another angle. Sometime, things aren't as simple we think.

Also, I realised how lost I was back then during the first few months in 2007. Come to think of it, after a year, I have yet to find my direction in life. But, I have confidence that I will find it soon. =D

Soon, half a year has passed. Most responsibilities have been passed on to the next batch. The only thing that I am suppose to do was focus my mind and soul to studies. Nothing more than this. However, a big thanks to Mdm Chan for allowing us to represent Hillgrove for the last time in a tournament. The Pesta Sukan was unforgettable. Till now, I still remember the feeling of winning the last game played during the carnival against Riverside. Hearing the cheering from the crowd and the encouragment from the coaches - the feeling was just simply fantastic. I think that was just the best way to end my journey of netball at Hillgrove.

After Pesta Sukan, Prelim came. I didn't perform for certain subjects. Overall result was just as I expected so there's nothing much that I can be upset with.

Just before I know, the big O comes. The whole period of 3 weeks was quite stressful. I still remember how stressed up I was just before Geography Paper. I still remember how lost I was before E.Maths Paper 2. Luckily, I have my close friends as well as the teachers who always help us whenever we need them. Thank you very much..!

Just before I know, O level has ended. During the holiday, I planned to work. In the end, I decided not to work as it will be just a burden for myself. Nonetheless, I think the holiday was sort of well spend (though most parts of the holidays were spent on relax).

Netball training was disappointing during holiday. The attendance was horrible. But, 塞翁失马，严得非福. We reformed almost everything. =D

Then, 2007 said goodbye and 2008 waved to us.

January 2008, was not a good month for me. Before I could get problems solve, new problems arise. I was facing problems from all areas. Worst of all, I lost the will to fight. It was these few days that I slowly regain the will to face challenges. Let's hope that Mouse Year will be an excellent year!

I only have 3 wishes for the new year:
1) Peace
2) Good Health and Happiness
3) Passion

I only have 1 resolution:
-Work harder in all areas.

To all out there, Happy New Year. May Mouse Year be a wonderful year for you!

I didn't go to school today. I wasn't feeling well in the morning so I decided to take a break for a day. In the afternoon, I was much better. Things didn't went the way I expected. =D.

For the whole morning, I was in my lalaland till 2.30pm. Nothing much in the afternoon. I only did this skin. I am quite satisfy with the skin. I tried a lot of new things such as combine pictures and do frames. I am a little disappointed by the colours of the words. The original colours of the words aren't what you are seeing right now. They should be much brighter. Overall, I think it is still quite good. =D

Sms-ed him today and he didn't reply for the second. =(.. Nevermind..

I was looking through my diary for 2007. I realised how many pages are spent on writing of him. HA!

Although was raining yesterday, we had training as per normal. There were 5 games of about 20 mins. I think it wasn't too bad. It was the club first time playing together at a full court. I think it was nice! We worked better as the games go on. =D

Today.. I am proud of the juniors! You guys are wonderful! Good Job people! Hillgrove won Teck Whye today at West Zone B Division Netball Championship today. The passes were good. They put on tight defend. Overall, it is an excellent game. Well Done, Juniors.. Keep it up!

The walk was nice. Your message melted me. You made me fall to the deepest depth.

All right, I have not blog properly for quite sometime. Ya, I have been quite emotional for the past few days, or rather for the past whole week. What on earth exactly happened? It all started with O level result. (Leave if you don't want to read what I will be typing.)

On 24th Jan, O level result were realised. I scored L1R5 - 11, 6As and 2Bs. Initially, people around were happy for me. However, as time passed by, I felt I was lousy. My mum kept comparing my result to my friends. and well, my friends scored 8 As, 7 As and etc. and Obviously, their aggregate for L1R5 were lower than mine. Apart from my mum's comparision, there were many people around me scoring 9 points, 7 points and etc. I really feel bad about myself. Next came, I felt so insulted by one of my friends. She insulted my result. Then, on Monday morning I went to a school, I felt my result was horrible enough that I was unwanted. With so much pressure around me. I felt I was lousy and the fact is that I am. I didn't do as well as others did.

That was only for academic. I felt I was unwanted at netball too. I felt that my skills were lousy. I felt I was lousy enough not be in the school team for JC. I totally lost confident in myself. I began to be very resistance to the world. I didn't like going to school at all. Things were really bad for me. One of the nights, I cried. That night, I just needed someone badly. For obvious reasons, I couldn't look for my parents. I looked for my closest friend but she wasn't available. I wanted to talk to him very much. I mean really very much but i just didn't dare. Thanks to one of my seniors, Cik Siti. She was my listener that day. Thank you very much!

Right now.. Things aren't very much looking good. I just wished to have him by my side, telling me everything will be fine.

I don't like your holiday.

Okay.. seriously, I don't know what to go for. I don't know what and which to choose and I am creating trouble. I am so sorry!

without you, everythings is just so wrong..

I feel really tired, mentally. And it is just so difficult to get rid of this tiredness. This tiredness make me feel so lerthagic. I don't have the energy to give my energy. I know I am at the limit of my limit. Another step, I will just start hating the world or I will just disappear from the world (literally).

Without you and with tiredness, it is impossible for me to move on right now.

I WANT YOU!

I wanted you to be by my side so much. I was really troubled and didn't know what to do. I really hoped you will be here for me. I just wanted to look into your eyes in the dark to find the answers.

lost..

I am so irritated. Everything looks so wrong. I hate it when I can't control my time freely. GRR!

Schedule for today:
9.30am to 11am - HOMEWORK (I hate to do them now)
3pm to 6pm - Netball

Things to finish but I don't know when to do:
Clean the TABLES.
Plants decoration
New Year Shopping (I want to buy clothes!)
Registration for JAE

Things for tomorrow:
Visit to PJC
Leaders' Meeting
OG18 gathering at Melissa's House
Netball from 2.30pm to 5.30pm

So many things (again)! Right now, I am like so blur. ARGH!

You are not here to give me moral support. ='(

All right, I will write more about O level another day but it will be soon though.. =) I shall update about today's event.

I am very tired after a day of activities. I was out in the morning at River Valley High School for games. The juniors... Honestly, I am still disapopinted with them but I hope they will take this lesson hard. I also hope they will not allow history to repeat. Afterwhich came back with school. I am always amazed with what I can talk to Cik Siti and how long we can talk to each other. HAHA! After returning from RVHS, we sat for an hour and chatted for an hour as well. Then, Home sweet home. At 1pm, I was out at Boon Lay Market near JJC for New Year Shopping. I am starting to fall in love with shopping for food. The feeling is just so nice. =D

When return from shopping, I went to met up Sam and Marianne. Well, very obvious the topic was on O level. Thanks people, I am more or less decided. =) At 5.30pm, headed for lesson. I was a little bit late.. =/ I must try to be early for the next lesson. After the lesson, I AM SO TIRED!

okay, now I really want a rest. I am really tired. Bye! and thanks people.

I didn't dare to talk to you anymore just like before. The stranger feeling is back. ='(

Things are sort of screwed up and kind of messy. Time does not seem to be in my control. I cannot exactly do things at the time I want. And this is bad. I really need to control my time.

Today looks much better compared to the other day. Phew!

Where to go? What's your suggestions/advice?

Why students fail their exams..? LOL.. it is pure craps!

It's not the fault of student ifhe/she fails because the year ONLY has 365 days...typical academic year for a student:

1. Sundays - 52 Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest.
Days left 313.


2. Summer holidays - 50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.
Days left 263.


3. 8 hours daily sleep - 130 days GONE.
Days left 141.


4. 1 hour for daily playing- (good for health) means 15 days.
Days left 126.


5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies (chewing properly & swallowing) - means 30 days.
Days left 96.


6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal) - means 15 days.
Days left 81.


7. Exam days - per year at least 35 days.
Days left 46.


8. Quarterly, half yearly and festival (holidays) - 40 days.
Days left 6.


9. For sickness - at least 3 days.
Days left 3.


10. Movies and functions- at least 2 days.
1 day left.


11. That 1 day is your birthday.
How can you study on that day ?!?!?!?!?!

Balance = 0
' How can a student pass ?????

Firstly, a big thank to everyone around me!

To my parents: I LOVE YOU!
To all my teachers: It was you that give me what I achieved today.
To my friends: thanks for your encouragement throughout the whole peirod of exams.

THANKS!

4E1, shall we have a lunch/dinner gathering during one of the weekends..?

Yesterday.. wa! Seriously, I wanted to blast off! But, they are lucky that I wasn't in good condition yesterday or I would have scream their heads off. I was very angry with their performance, extremely angry.

To someone out there:
You earn people's respect, not ask for respect. Seriously, I am extremely disappointed with your performance yesterday. You simply tell your opponent that you have given up on the game. Don't blame on others that take your job. Blame on yourself that you are not doing a good job.

As for today.. I am disappointed with myself. Seriously, totally disappointed with myself. I am so horrible today. I am guilty with my performance. So sorry!

School wise, BORING!

DEFINITION OF UMPIRE : A person appointed to rule on plays

Is it me?

I LOVE MICKEY! I LOVE HER SMILE! SHE ROCKS!!!!!

Today's training was all right. But, seriously, I gave up on her already. No point holding on to someone who wants to go.

The feeling on court is ever so nice. Flying across and in court is just so wonderful. Netball rules!

Tomorrow is Monday. I used to like Mondays but not now. Monday is just so dreadful! I can't wait for Friday and weekends to come.

you oh you..

Has been in JJC for 3 weeks. So far, the class is all right. CCA wise, all right as well.. I guessssss.. So ya.. everything is still going sort of well. But just that I am a little sick of studying.

An amazing fact: I have studied ten years straight, non-stop. Thinking back, time flied. Our brains are amazing. Seriously, I feel that after ten years, I wanted a break so badly. I mean literally a break and the break last for months or even a year. But, well.. I know this is almost impossible especially in Singapore. At any point of time, if you dare to take break more than others of your age does, you will be known as a bad kid. True isn't it? Furthermore, as you grow up, the studies is going at a ever faster rate.

I am really envy of how my brother studied throughout his o level then a level and now in university. Now that I am only handling the teeny weeny start of JC life, I am already sick of studies. I wondered how my brother go through the whole life in JC. Now, I also understand how my the other brother felt.

Study is just such a boredom to me but I have no choice since I am in Singapore. =/

Many people asked if I am going to stay on in JJC or even in JC system. Seriously, I am not sure. Howver, I do have some thinking for Polytechnics though.

Courses that I am considering:
Accountancy
Environmental Management and Water Technology
Horticulture and Landscape Management

But seriously, I still don't know where I want to go.. How about you guys?

失去了生命的导火线，人生无论如何看待，它就是那么死板。

I am confused.

I want you.. by my side..

Am I running away from reality? Do I really need a break?

Ideas are up at my mind. They are kind of active in my brain. Some people are shocked by the ideas that I have in my mind. Some of them supported my choice. Honestly, I am just lost in the desert now. No direction to follow.

Idea of withdraw came to my mind. Idea of changing environment, idea of changing system, idea of a long break.. all of these came to my mind.

*sigh*

I was worried for you.

Nevermind..

I have been busy with quite a few things and almost every night when reached home, I was about to knock out already.

For the first week, I was away from home for orientation camp at JJC from 3rd to 5th Jan. It was great. I liked the atmosphere for the camp very much. The night before the camp, was away at Causeway Point to repair the phone. I reached home at 10.30pm that night. Saturday knocked out till the next morning after dismissed from the camp.

On Sunday, we had our very first club training for 2008. I wasn't very happy with some people's attitude. However, the training went well though.

For the whole of this week, I was heavily committed to netball. I returned to Hillgrove on Tues and Thurs for school training. I wasn't very happy with the seniors performance. I think they can be better with their attitude. Thursday, I was so angry with them that I blasted at them. They need to practice their passes more often. I was down for JJC netball training on Wed and Fri. Their trainings are all right, I guess. Yesterday, I was down at Kallang for Daisy Tan Carnival and a test. I was very impressed with one of the seniors, Farah's, performance. Well done, Farah! Keep it up! After returning from Kallang, Marianne and I went for SP open house. It was fine. We just took some information booklets and left. Reached home in the late afternoon. Knock out at 5.30pm.

Keep going Hillgrovians! I know you guys can do it for the West Zone. Jia You!

1. Revise Biology
2. Chem Worksheet (Note)
3. Maths WS
4. Research for geography
5. Read

and.. Netball training from 3 to 6pm.

*Been busy and tired, will update about life soon.

Happy 2008!

It's 29th December 2007 already! 2 days and a few more hours left for 2007. Wow!

All right, it is such a rare sence that I don't update my blog for a few days for this December. Actually, I wasn't busy these few days but I was just to tired and lazy to update my blog. =P All right, so what have happened these few days?

These few days I hadn't been feeling very much well. On thursday night, my body was giving me signals that I need to sleep early if I don't want to fall sick. Yesterday, my ankle was kind of hurting and today, the sun made me haywire. I am feeling sort of dizzy right now. =_+

Despite being sick, there were quite a number of activities going on. On Thursday, I had a hair cut in the morning. I cleared all my papers in the afternoon (finally). All the workseheets, mock papers, test papers and notes are well filed up and neatly arrange. I realised how small my house is. I didn't have much space to put my files. I could only stack them up and put them on my drawers. The shelf in the storeroom now is packed with books. Seriously, clearing all these papers gave me an excellent sense of satisfaction. =) Nothing much for the night afterwhich.

Friday was suppose to be boring since the court is yet available for training. However, after meeting, Shi Jie, Alia and Michelle my day was changed. We had lunch at Causeway Point and played basketball afterwhich. It has been such a long time since I last played basketball out of school. The last time I played outside school was 28th Dec 2005. Oh my goodness! You know what? It is exactly two years apart! Ha!

I was out at Kallang today. I was under the sun for 2 hours. THese 2 hours of sun made my head go round and roung which usually don't happen in the past. I think it has been really quite sometime since I was under the sun. All right, I think I need another rest. BYE!

Sorry Li Ling, can't join you for tomorrow, I think I needed a rest.

1. Do the following WITHOUT complaints

2. Choose 5 people to do this after you completed yours

3. Leave a tag on he person’s tagboard to say he/she have been tagged


Favourites

Colour: All colours


Food: Anything that is edible

Song: Yan Lei De Wei Dao (The Flavour of Tears) by Energy

Movie: Don't really like movies.

Sport: Netball.

Season: Spring.

Ice-cream: ALL.


Currents

Mood: Neutral

Taste: My mouth is empty

Clothes: white t-shirt and shorts

Desktop: HP Pavilion a1377d media center PC

Time: 0911hrs

Surroundings: HP, house phone, steering wheel, speakers, tv, headphones, mic, printer, joystick gearbox etc .

Annoyances: nil.


First

Crush: identity is protected.

Movie: Lion king??

Music: National anthem


Lasts

Cigarette: nil

Drink(alcohol): Singapore Sling

Car Ride: nil

Phone call: yesterday, 8 sec

CD played: upgraded to MP3(long time ago)


Have you ever

Dated your best friend: no

Broken the law: siao

Been arrested: then can I be still here?

Skinny-dipped: upper ini?

Been on TV: Yup.ITS SHOWTIME! Cheerleader

Kissed someone you don’t know: you need a mental doctor?


5 things that you are wearing:

1. T-shirt

2. Shorts

3. Undergarments

4. Spectacles

5. Watch


4 things you’ve done today:

1. Eat

2. Sleep

3. Use computer

4. Use HP

5. Stand up and Walk


3 things you can hear right now:

1. More than words by extreme (song)

2. Vehicles passing by

3. My grandma rattling pots and pans


1 thing you do when you are bored:

Find that SPECIAL PERSON=)


5 people:

Nobody force you to do nothing.

Nothing much happened yesterday. I only managed to cleaned my clothes drawers, cleared some papers and wrote some cards. Didn't finish everything that I wanted.

As for today, the afternoon was suppose to be devited to netball but due to some reasons the training is cancelled. It wasn't too bad for me, I guessed. I made use of the time I had to clear up A LOT of things. I washed my ankle and knee guards. Cleaned my bag (FINALLY!!). Cleared a whole stack of papers. Not bad Not bad.. hee hee.. =)

For tonight, gonna write finish all my card and sent the email out!!! I had better do so man!! If possible, I will clear my table as well. The table is once again in a mess.

Since I get things done faster than I expected it of myself, shall have a change in plan...

Plan for tomorrow:
Morning - Hair Cut (my hair is kind of long now )
Afternoon - Arrange and pack my shelf in the storeroom plus self training
Night - Revision and Reading

Sometimes we may just don't know what will happen next. Not that I am being permisstic but rather, I just don't what will happen next, seriously.

Seriously, I want to tell you that I have never get over you. I want to hold your hand. I want to be with you. I really didn't want the night to end. I asked you if you are in hurry because I wanted you to stay. I wished we didn't just ate our food that night. I wished we could spend more time together that night. I will not mind even if I were to stay by your side till the next day.
emm...
I hope I didn't see that look wrongly. Were you telling me somethng through that look that day? Were there a message for me?
emm...
I wished the phone call didn't end even if I have to pay more when the bill comes. I wished the night was spent on phone with you. I don't mind talking to you till my saliva dries up. I just want to be with you. I like you. I really hope to hear from you if you ever fall for me even if I am not around. This is all for you, 52637 T.
Things went through me mind... Life can just be so unpredictable at time..

Ahh.. Holiday is coming to an end. It is soooooo fast!!! Countdown.. 7 more days to 2008! Oh goodness!!

I have still a few more things to do for 2007!! Got to work extra hours! lol!

I was out at Christine's Birthday yesterday. It was all right, I guess. We were just talking and talking and cam-whoring.. Then, was out at CDANS swimming pool today with LI Ling. It was not bad. =)

Plan for the rest of the holiday:

25th Dec:
Morning - Clean the clothes drawers
Afternnon - Send email and write finish the cards
Night - File in half the paper s

26th Dec:
Morning - Wash my bag and send out all the cards
Afternoon - clear some papers and off for netball till night

27th Dec:
Morning - Clear the remaining papers
Afternoon - Clear my table plus self training at home
Night - reading

28th Dec:
Morning - Pack my table
Afternoon - Lessons and off to netball till night

29th Dec:
Morning - Lesson
Afternoon - Nap (hehe =P)
Night - Reading

30th Dec:
Morning - Get everything ready for a new year
Afternoon - Off to netball till night

31st Dec:
Shall keep this day as it is.. =)

All right, gonna work on stuffs now..

Thanks... but.......................

I need to spend every second wisely from now onwards. I realised how much more things I need to do before the new year starts.

- write 2 cards
- write an email to Mrs Lim
- Clean my drawers
- Clear those stacks of papers
- Wash my bag (I am really lazy to do this)
- Clear my table
- Build up my stamina
- Do reading (been trying to do so but for reasons, nothing much is done, =_=)

Oh goodness.. so many things to do yet not much time left.

It feels like a burden to me. I really want to enjoy the game without any burden on me. To come to think of all the related problems, I always feel the pressure. I want to feel flying when on court. I know there's one person who feel worse than I do. It is just so difficult to hang in there. I really hope someone can help the both of us. I really hope so...

Hold my hand, will you?

我不知道我是用什么感觉感情来对待你。

Today's theme is Friends.



Honestly, I feel that I do not have many friends in Hillgrove. Although I am known for a student who involve in almost every single programme in Hillgrove.

2007 is coming to an end! 10 more days for 2007 only! Time flies, didn't it? 4 years of life in a school which I didn't predict that I will be in, has passed. I am truly amazed by what I have been through. Everything has made me grow. Thanks to everyone who has given me everything.

For the next few entries will be some flashback about my days in Hillgrove Secondary School. Each entry will have different theme. Today's theme will be CCA.

Honestly, I didn't enter Hillgrove with the mindset of carrying on with Netball. I remembered I wanted to join CCA like NPCC, Badminton and Girls' Brigade. However, during the CCA day, I only signed up for Netball. Yet, after the CCA day, I went for Basketball try out. I got into the team but sometime after the selection, I decided to withdraw. Then, I was in NPCC. Seriously, this was a little bit unexpected for myself. Despite how much I wanted to be part of NPCC in my primary school days, I didn't notice much about NPCC during the CCA day and it wasn't my first choice of CCA. Yet in the end, NPCC became my first CCA.

Only in June 2004, did I go back to Netball.

Since June 2004, I had 2 CCAs. Throughout these years, it wasn't easy to handle both of them well. There were days where trainings for both crashed with one another. There were days where I missed NPCC trainings due to tournaments. I had numerous quarrels with Miss Wang over these. The quarrels made me detest NPCC for quite somewhile. Now, I understand all the scoldings and naggings that she gave me. I think she is actually very kind to me. If I were her at that time, I think I would have been worse. All the scoldings and naggings that she had given me, really made me learn. I feel that they are very precious despite how much I hate them.

Apart from the struggle of handling both CCAs, I think most of the every other part of the memories of both CCAs are pretty sweet though I have some regrets. In netball, I think I was one of the very lucky few to be able to represent Hillgrove for years. I still remember I started representing Hillgrove when I was in Sec 2 for B Division. Although I didn't play much in the zonal tournament in 2005, I am still glad that I am in the team. However, there were times where I am really upset when I am just not able to play in a game or performed badly. This is all a learning process. A big thank you to Kai Ling for helping me and giving me chances to play and improve myself. Of course, a big thank you to all my team-mates that I have played with before. Without you guys, there wouldn't be me in netball. I truly value the friendship that I have made in the team. All these years, Geraldina..辛苦你了! As I moved on in netball, my dearest Seniors stepped down, Kai Ling left. New members came so did a new coach come. I hoped that the juniors will continue to work hard and improve themselves. A big thank to Madam Siti. She has never failed to drive me to a higher level. To all teachers who have in-charged of netball before - Ms Chong, Ms Alicia Ang, Ms Koh, Mdm Chan, Mdm Teh, thank you very much for what you have given us!

NPCC is just like a drama to me. The drama has been on air for 4 years. The final episode has just ended not long ago. I remembered I joined NPCC under the influence of my brother and I wanted camps very much. I also respected NPCC very much. I actually didn't get much from what I expected from NPCC. I expected a lot of outdoor activities. NPCC turned out to focus on drills and campcraft only. My batch was a pretty an unlucky and troublesome batch. We aren't very united. We don't learn things well. We only started training after April 2004. Many people tried to help us but most of them gave up in the end. It was indeed very sad and disappointing that only very few lasted till the last training. Nonetheless, all of us graduated from NPCC successfully in the end. A big thanks to those who have helped us before - Ms Wang, Mr Tham, Mr Teo, Mrs Chew, Ma'am Wanyu, Ma'am Lydia, Sir Jeremy, Sir Soon Sim, Sir Sam, Sir Izwan, Sir Faizal, Sir/IC James, IC Atinah. As well as to those sirs and ma'ams who have organised the NPCC events and helped out in our school events, thanks!

Throughout my 4 years in NPCC, I found a few soulmates who are always there for me when I need them. To Sarina: Thanks buddy. I know I have given you a thousand and one problems during these years but thanks for helping me whenever I need you. To Yong En: I just so love our hang out. Those moments after trainings with you are unforgettable. Those days where we just simply complain about every single thing about NPCC are just so unforgettable as well. Thanks for always there for me.

I just so love these memories I had with both the CCAs. But, I know things could have been better back then. Well, time has passed. Let's just take it as a lesson to be learnt. =)

This morning's weather was.... cooooooooold. I just loved the wind. Excellent morning! I slept all the way till 12noon. Afterwhich, slacked till 3 plus going to 4. Only then did I start doing something. I tried to arrange PAPERS.

My level of shelf in the storeroom is packed with papers.It is kind of headache to clear ALL the papers. My files are way too small for all the papers. It is very hectic to sort out all the papers. It is probably going to take me daysss to sort them out and file them up.

I truly realised how many trees have we killed during the period before O level. I have just so many practice papers!! My goodness..

All right, I am going to continue to sort out my papers.. BYEEE!

Was out today in the noon. I realised a few situations that irritate me quite a bit. People are kind of lack of patient. I always wondered why can't people wait for passengers to alight from train before boarding. Why do they want to block the exit just because they want to enter the train ASAP? The practice of standing on the left of the escalator doesn't seen to be in use. I think despite the time of thday, we should always stand on the left of the escalator.

--
The shopping trip today was kind of good. Spent 2 hours at Jurong Point. Back at home at 6 plus. Slacked. Kind of bored!!!!

我害怕失去你。。。

Good game! Good effort! Good job! Keep going juniors. You have done well! That's the way! The netball game earlier on was fantastic! I truly enjoyed it. The laughter just went on and on and on. Keep it up people. That's the way!

I..........

Things are going sweet for her. I think I am glad for her. It is really good to see her move on and seriously I have never seen her heaven smile before. This is the first time that I saw her smiling with the world going round her only. I mean really. Giving you my blessing, dear buddy. However, please don't be too over. Personelly, I feel that you are going kind of over already. Maybe I don't know how things work in life, esp. BGR but I hope everything goes well for you.



That night was great. I can't use other words to describe though I have some other better words in my mind because I don't have the right to do so (yet). Just like what she said, I wish the night didn't end.

I truly want...

I am seriously getting fed up with some people. It is just so pointless to help people who don't help themselves. A effort-less game is a lousy game. Being absent for trainings is fun right? Can you guys please think for us? Nevermind. Getting angry for you guys are just simply wasting my energy.

Had netball earlier on. Certain parts of the "training" was fun though. =D No point talking about those parts where I just feel so hopeless.

Damn it! I have wasted so much time this holiday. Damn it! I need to buck up! Come on! Hui Mui, BUCK UP! I have better use time properly and meaningful. I seriously didn't do much to help myself. Not much things are done. buck up buck up!

I am going to be selfish. It is just so irritating to respect people who don't respect you.

So...... sooo.....

Okay, let's see how free am I..

Today: Evening going out with mum
Sunday: Out with Sarina in the early noon. Netball Training at 4pm
Monday: Lesson in the morning
Tuesday: Nothing
Wednesday: Nothing
Thursday: Nothing at the moment
Friday: Netball Training in the late afternoon.

My goodness. I am very very very free right? Yes I am! People, can help me fill up the empty spaces? I am just so bored at home.. I am on for anything. Seriously, anything. =)

Earlier on went for netball. Seriously, horrible! I am serious about this. to all juniors who are reading this. The game was horrible. I only saw Michelle working. The rest were modelling. Seriously, you guys simply give up even for the 5 VS 3 game. It is truly disappointing.

Thanks Cik Siti. Your words are valued. =D

Youtube is addictive. wahahaha! I did not sleep for the whole midnight. I planned to stay awake till 8am or 9am but due to some reason went to bed at around 6am.

For the whole morning, I was watching some variety shows and now had some drama planned out. I think all of them are Taiwan Idol Drama series. Here are the dramas in line for myself:

1. 爱情两好三坏
2. 斗牛 要不要
3. 魔剑生死棋
4. 公主小妹
5. 终极一家
6. 美味关系

The weird thing is I woke up at around 10.20am. I was super tired by 1.30pm. Seriously tired. Went back to my bed at 1.30pm and slept all the way till 6.30pm. =) Pig huh? Everyday, Sleep and sleep. haha! But the nap today is so much better than yesterday's. I don't get headache after waking up. I think there was lessing things in my mind when I sleep.

All right, gonna carry on watching my dramas at youtube. Bye!

I almost could not wake up to go out today. =_+ and the thing is yesterday this morning I could not sleep and I didn't sleep yesterday afternoon. For the whole morning I was feeling very very very sleepy. On my way down to BUgis in the afternoon, I was taking a nap on the train. On my way back to Bukit Batok, I was taking another nap on the train. When I reached home in the late afternoon, I slept from 5pm to 8.30pm. Seriously man! However, the long nap wasn't nice at all. My body was resting but my mind wasn't. There were quite a number of things going on in my mind. Netball, of course and many more. When I woke up, my head was very heavy and I think I had a headache. It is much better now. =)

Not doing anything now other than blogging here. Boring right? I seriously feel the bored-ness.

Drama in line..
斗牛，要不要
魔剑生死棋

I miss you.

I will consider today as a more productive day although I didn't carry out my actually plan. I actually planned to go Bugis and have netball at 5pm.

The weather at the early part of the day was excellent. The sun was shining brightly. However, decided to stay at home and training was cancelled due to some reasons. But but but, the lazy bum was hardworking today. =D I washed my shoes and my watch strap. I also opened up an ENGLISH storybook to read. This is rare! I am quite proud of myself for this. =P

Other than these, I was practically lazing around. =(

I feel like watching shows, movies, dramas and all kind of television programmes! It has been years since I last do so. Days back in primary school, I was a live television schedule. I can tell you every show at every hour. Now, I watch at most 2 television programmes a day. Sometimes, I can just stay away from TV for 2 whole days. I totally lost touch with the TV. Anyone has the drama series, Dou Niu, Yao Bu Yao( 斗牛，要不要)?

I will stay for you. I promise.

I heard of this before and I believe in what it is saying..

The Greatest Distance is when you are in front of me but I can't feel your presence.

You made me feel like you are just like the weather. You are making the water so cold that I don't dare to use the water. I really hope that you were sad for what I am hoping.

---

Just a boring day. Seriously, boring. Nothing much for me to do. I just don't feel so right about the life I am having now. I feel empty. And honestly, I miss Maths! haha! seriously. I just simply miss the numbers.

Meet up Marianne in the evening. hahaha! (marianne, this laughter is for you! I know you know what happened.. =_+)

Where are you, boy?

我真得很希望，很希望他们所说的会变成事实。我很希望我那时做的梦会成真。

歌手：徐冥蕾 专辑：新绝代双骄三游戏的
歌曲：守候

我能等你吗?
在那淡淡月光下
静静想你

我能等你吗?
在那熟悉的地方
轻唤着你

风里传来你的呼吸
云里映着你的笑意
林里的鸟相偎相依
我却孤寂

我等你回来
把那窗儿蚩向我依赖

我等你回来
带着纯真的风采
宛如小孩

衣上装满你的记忆
夜里的梦多么清晰
冰冷黎明只剩叹息
如何忘你

迷离的夜
飘响着无边境的旋律
在耳边旋绕不停

载着思绪的雨
带我找你
纵然是梦想也罢

宁愿寂寞放弃自由
怎样也想抓住你的手
春夏秋冬你的承诺
我会守候


歌手：陈淑桦 专辑：陈淑桦珍藏版
歌曲：一生守候

等待著你
等待你慢慢的靠近我
陪著我长长的夜到尽头
别让我独自守候
等待著你
等待你默默凝望著我
告诉我你的未来属于我
除了我别无所求
你知道这一生
我只为你执著
管别人心怎么想眼怎么看话怎么说
你知道这一生
我只为你守候
我对你情那么深意那么浓爱那么多
等待著你
等待你轻轻拉我的手
陪着我长长的路慢慢走
一直到天长地久
等待着你
等待你紧紧拥抱著我
告诉我你的心里只有我
除了我别无选择
不管他喜还是悲
苦还是甜
对还是错
永远爱我

You know what's going on when I put on lyrics.

Happy Birthday Alvin! Sorry friend for not going for your party. Sorry Atikah. @_@

I am so broke now. My piggy bank is so empty. =( Shall see how it goes..

I need to start washing my things now.

Things to wash:
Black Slingbag
Watch's strap
Clothes' drawerS
School Shoes

I feel like washing them but I am just so lazy... =P Shall see how (again?) hehe.. what's more the weather has been kind of moody, just like me. Ha! Now, you know Hui Mui is a lazy bum..

Seriously, I am going to give up watching Why Why Love. I have watch about 8 episodes and seriously, this is a rare drama that after watching for so long it didn't catch my attention at all. I have no idea what's the focus for the drama.

I carried out bold actions. I wished your answer was no, seriously. I wish what they said is reality.

This is what the friendster horoscope tells me about today:

You are ready for seriously bold action today! It's time to step up and make the grand gestures you know you can make. If you have been beating around the bush with someone you have growing feelings for, today is the day to bite the bullet and confess your true feelings. It's now or never. If you have been contemplating a travel adventure, today is the day to book the tickets and commit to going. Time is slipping away, you need to act now to get what you want.

Is it true?

I an back in my don't know mood again. seriously, the feeling of lost-ness is in me now. =_+ I regretted saying things out. I rather keep things away. but oh well.. nevermind.

All right I am back here. What exactly has been going on? My blog sounded kind of sad recently. Maybe I am just not getting things done, I guess. My mind has been wondering all over the place. My temper has seriously flew high and sorry people. Seriously, I have no idea what happened to my temper. It just went off. I don't seem to be able to control it. =_+ My mood has been kind of bad. Nothing seems to interest me. I have been watching a Taiwan drama, "Why Why Love" over the past few days. I have watched almost 5 episodes and it didn't interest me at all. I am not sure if it is the content of the drama that is the problem r is it myself. The drama is kind of boring. Reading of books didn't interest me as well. Goodness! Things are just so wrong. *Sigh* And well.. For those who knows me well, will know what can give me just a depressed mood. Seriously, I have no idea how to deal with this. It is kind of sucky. Nevermind. I think time need to help me again.

Today is 7th December! People, do you still remember this date? I miss all the people from 13 nations so much! and woah! It has been a year since we last met. Time flies. I feel like flying to Japan now and celebrate Christmas like we did last year. MERRY CHRISTMAS TOYKO!! I just simply miss Japan. My twin, Liz! argh! Long long long time didn't see her already! Babe, I miss you!!!

Miami oh Miami, I think you have slept loooooong enough. It is time to wake up and fight like a champion. You guys played so dead. I wanna see the champion in you guys again!!

I want you

Life looks very wrong now. Things go very wrongly as well.

I think I really need a lot of time to get everything right..

I want to be beside you now.

I am worried. I am sad. I am jealous.

This is what the friendster says :
Relationship issues will come to the forefront today when it feels like someone may be holding you back from happiness. Re-evaluate what is going on and ask yourself if this is a positive partnership for you. As long as you are happy with who you are and where you are going together, you're doing fine and this is just an unpleasant phase. But if you keep asking for things to change and you don't think they are hearing you, it's time to sit down and have an honest heart to heart.

IDK.

Cik Siti, very sorry.

Where am I heading now?

I feel like stepping one step forward. But i don't know how.

My mood is kind of down now. Partly because of what I know. I can feel the sadness. Partly because of what happened at home. Sometimes I wonder what's call home. It sucks when the moment you reach home and people just don't bother about you and worse still, parent starts nagging. Say this also wrong, say that also wrong. do this also wrong, do that also wrong. 难道就没有一样东西是对的吗？Why is there only wrong? Seriously, there is nothing right? do you actually know that I am your child?

Sometimes I really wonder if I am a human.

Yesterday.. emm.. I wouldn't say that it is exactly a good day. Went out in the afternoon with Merina and Cik Siti to get myself a pair of shoes. Finally! By right we have more things to shop for but in the end due to me, we shopped for my shoes for 4 hours! hehe.. By right, we need to buy skorts as well but we didn't. Hehe.. thanks people. Love you! and tata.. MY SHOES!! I love my shoes. so does Cik Siti! =P We love MY shoes! Afterwhich we head to training from Queensway shopping center.

I am quite please with the attendance. However, I didn't like the attitude of some people at all. It sucks man! Don't wanna go details into it. I left early to send my friend into NS. LOL! We are proud of ourselves that we tricked 3 people. But during the whole dinner, I didn't feel eactly right cos of what we heard. I am kind of worry. Anyway, after dinner, went Marianne's house (again) for some shooting. The lighting was bad. I received hard knock on my head physically. You can see a bruise on my forehead now. But no worry, I am fine. Seriously used to it already. I still remember months back, sickening man.. One carnival,received 5 wake up calls at 5 different parts of my head. =_+

Hope everything is all right for you. I will be there for you if you need.